(思维决定行为。成长，从改变三种不良认知开始)
There's three kinds of destructive beliefs that make us less effective, and rob us of our mental strength.
有三种破坏性的信念，会降低我们的效率，并剥夺我们的精神力量。
The first one is unhealthy beliefs about ourselves. We tend to feel sorry for ourselves. And while it's OK to be sad when something bad happens, self-pity goes beyond that. It's when you start to magnify your misfortune. When you think things like, "Why do these things always have to happen to me? I shouldn't have to deal with it." That way of thinking keeps you stuck, keeps you focused on the problem, keeps you from finding a solution. And even when you can't create a solution, you can always take steps to make your life or somebody else's life better. But you can't do that when you're busy hosting your own pity party.
第一个是对我们自己的不健康的认知，我们倾向于为自己感到难过。当糟糕的事情发生时，悲伤是可以的，但自怜的情绪不止这样。当你开始放大你的不幸，当你去想，为什么这些事总要发生在我的身上？我不该处理这件事的，这种思维方式会让你陷入困境，让你找不到解决的办法。即使你不能创造一个解决方案，你也可以努力使你的生活或其他人的生活更好。但当你忙于怜悯自己的时候，你就不可能做得到了。
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