I Think You're Fat
This story is about something called Radical/'rædɪkl/ Honesty/'ɑnəsti/. It may change your life. (But honestly, we don't really care.)
By A.J. Jacobs
Here's the truth about why I'm writing this article:
I want to fulfill/fʊlˈfɪl/ my contract with my boss. I want to avoid getting fired. I want all the attractive women I knew in high school and college to read it. I want them to be amazed and impressed and feel a vague/veɡ/ regret/rɪ'ɡrɛt/ over their decision not to have sex with me, and maybe if I get divorced/dɪ'vɔrst/ or become a widower/'wɪdoɚ/, I can have sex with them someday at a reunion/riˈjunjən/. I want Hollywood to buy my article and turn it into a movie, even though they kind of already made the movie ten years ago with Jim Carrey.
I want to get congratulatory/kən'ɡrætʃələtɔri/ e-mails and job offers that I can politely/pəˈlaɪtlɪ/ decline/dɪ'klaɪn/. Or accept if they're really good. Then get a generous/'dʒɛnərəs/ counteroffer/ˈkaʊntɚˌɔfɚ/ from my boss.
To be totally honest, I was sorry I mentioned this idea to my boss about three seconds after I opened my mouth. Because I knew the article would be a pain in the ass/æs/ to pull off. Dammit/ˈdæmɪt/. I should have let my colleague/'kɑliɡ/ Tom Chiarella write it. But I didn't want to seem lazy.
What I mentioned to my boss was this: a movement called Radical Honesty/'ɑnəsti/.
The movement was founded by a sixty-six-year-old Virginia/və(:)'dʒinjə/-based psychotherapist /ˌsaɪko'θɛrəpɪst/ named Brad Blanton. He says everybody would be happier if we just stopped lying/'laɪɪŋ/. Tell the truth, all the time. This would be radical enough -- a world without fibs/fɪb/ -- but Blanton goes further. He says we should toss/tɔs/ out the filters between our brains and our mouths. If you think it, say it. Confess/kən'fɛs/ to your boss your secret plans to start your own company. If you're having fantasies/'fæntəsi/ about your wife's sister, Blanton says to tell your wife and tell her sister. It's the only path to authentic/ɔ'θɛntɪk/ relationships. It's the only way to smash/smæʃ/ through modernity's/mɑˈdɚnɪti/ soul-deadening/'dɛdnɪŋ/ alienation/ˌeljəˈneʃən/. Oversharing? No such thing.
Yes. I know. One of the most idiotic/'ɪdɪ'ɑtɪk/ ideas ever, right up there with Vanilla/və'nɪlə/ Coke /kok/ and giving Phil/'fɪlo/ Spector a gun permit. Deceit/dɪ'sit/ makes our world go round. Without lies, marriages would crumble /'krʌmbl/, workers would be fired, egos/'iɡo/ would be shattered /'ʃætɚ/, governments/'gʌvɚnmənt/ would collapse/kə'læps/.
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