了不起的盖茨比 第八章 第二节 往事如烟--执着的爱也是要有陪伴的爱(二)

2021-07-05 20:44:0006:07 78
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He might have despised himself, for he had certainly taken her under false pretenses. I don’t mean that he had traded on his phantom millions, but he had deliberately given Daisy a sense of security; he let her believe that he was a person from much the same stratum as herself—that he was fully able to take care of her. As a matter of fact he had no such facilities—he had no comfortable family standing behind him and he was liable at the whim of an impersonal government to be blown anywhere about the world.

他也许应该鄙视自己的,因为他确实用欺骗的手段占有了她,我不是说他利用了他那虚幻的百万家财。但是他有意给黛西造成一种安全感,让她相信他的出身跟她不相上下——相信他完全能够照料她。实际上,他并没有这种能力——他背后没有生活优裕的家庭撑腰,而且只要全无人情味的政府一声令下,他随时都可以被调到世界上任何地方去。

But he didn’t despise himself and it didn’t turn out as he had imagined. He had intended, probably, to take what he could and go—but now he found that he had committed himself to the following of a grail. He knew that Daisy was extraordinary but he didn’t realize just how extraordinary a ‘nice’ girl could be. She vanished into her rich house, into her rich, full life, leaving Gatsby—nothing. He felt married to her, that was all.

但是他并没有鄙视自己,事情的结果也出乎他的意料。他起初很可能打算及时行乐,然后一走了之——但是现在他发现他已经把自己献身于追求一种理想。他知道黛西不间寻常,但是他并没认识到一位大家闺秀究竟 有多少不同寻常。她回到她那豪华的住宅里,回到她那丰富美满的生活,然不见了,给盖茨比什么也没留下。他觉得他已经和她结了婚了,如此而已。

When they met again two days later it was Gatsby who was breathless, who was somehow betrayed. Her porch was bright with the bought luxury of star-shine; the wicker of the settee squeaked fashionably as she turned toward him and he kissed her curious and lovely mouth. She had caught a cold and it made her voice huskier and more charming than ever and Gatsby was overwhelmingly aware of the youth and mystery that wealth imprisons and preserves, of the freshness of many clothes and of Daisy, gleaming like silver, safe and proud above the hot struggles of the poor.

两天之后,他们俩再见面时,显得心慌意乱,似乎上当受骗的倒是盖茨比。她家凉台沐浴在灿烂的星光里。她转身让他吻她那张奇妙、可爱的嘴时,时髦的长靠椅的柳条吱吱作响,她看了凉,她的声音比平时更沙哑,更动人。盖茨比深切地体会到财富怎样禁甸和保存青春与神秘,体会到一套套衣装怎样使人保持清析,体会到黛西像白银一样皎皎发光,安然高踞于穷苦人激烈的生存斗争之上。

‘I can’t describe to you how surprised I was to find out I loved her, old sport. I even hoped for a while that she’d throw me over, but she didn’t, because she was in love with me too. She thought I knew a lot because I knew different things from her.... Well, there I was, way off my ambitions, getting deeper in love every minute, and all of a sudden I didn’t care. What was the use of doing great things if I could have a better time telling her what I was going to do?’

我没法向你形容我发现自己爱上了她以后感到多么惊讶,老兄。有一阵我甚至希望她把我甩掉,但她没有,因为她也爱我。她认为我懂很多事,因为我懂的和她懂的不一样⋯⋯唉,我就是那样,把雄心壮志撇在一边,每一分钟都在情网越陷越深,而且忽然之间我也什么都不在乎了。如果我能够告诉她我打算去做些什么而从中得到更大的快乐,那么又何必去做大事呢?”

On the last afternoon before he went abroad he sat with Daisy in his arms for a long, silent time. It was a cold fall day with fire in the room and her cheeks flushed. Now and then she moved and he changed his arm a little and once he kissed her dark shining hair. The afternoon had made them tranquil for a while as if to give them a deep memory for the long parting the next day promised. They had never been closer in their month of love nor communicated more profoundly one with another than when she brushed silent lips against his coat’s shoulder or when he touched the end of her fingers, gently, as though she were asleep.

在他动身到海外之前的最后一个下午,他搂着黛西默默地坐了很长的时间。那是一个寒冷的秋日,屋子里生了火,她的两颊烘得通红。她不时移动一下,他也微微挪动一同胳臂,有一次他还吻吻她那乌黑光亮的头发。下午已经使他们平静了一会,仿佛为了在他们记忆中留下一个深刻的印象,为第二天即将开始的长远的分离做好准备。她用无言的嘴唇拂过地上衣的肩头,或者他温柔地碰一碰她的指尖,仿佛她是在睡梦之中,他俩在这一月的相爱中从来没有像这样亲密过,也从来没有像这样深刻地互通衷曲。

He did extraordinarily well in the war. He was a captainbefore he went to the front and following the Argonne battles he got his majority and the command of the divisional machine guns. After the Armistice he tried frantically to get home but some complication or misunderstanding sent him to Oxford instead. He was worried now—there was a quality of nervous despair in Daisy’s letters. She didn’t see why he couldn’t come. She was feeling the pressure of the world outside and she wanted to see him and feel his presence beside her and be reassured that she was doing the right thing after all.

他在战争中一帆风顺。还没上前线他就当到上尉,阿贡战役之后他就晋升少校,当上了师机枪连的连长。停战以后他急得发疯地要求回国,但是由于混乱或者误会,他却被送到了牛津。他现在担心——因为黛西的信里流露出紧张的绝望情绪。她不明白他为什么不能回来。她开始感觉到外界的压力,因此她需要见他,需要感到有他在她身边,需要他安慰她,说她所做的事完全正确。

For Daisy was young and her artificial world was redolent of orchids and pleasant, cheerful snobbery and orchestras which set the rhythm of the year, summing up the sadness and suggestiveness of life in new tunes. All night the saxophones wailed the hopeless comment of the ‘Beale Street Blues’ while a hundred pairs of golden and silver slippers shuffled the shining dust. At the grey tea hour there were always rooms that throbbed incessantly with this low sweet fever, while fresh faces drifted here and there like rose petals blown by the sad horns around the floor.

毕竟黛西还年轻,并且她那人为的世界充满了兰花、愉快的势利风尚和乐队——是那些乐队定当年的节奏,用新的曲调总结人生的哀愁和温情。萨克斯省通宵呜咽着《比尔街爵士乐》绝望的哀吟,同时一百双金银舞鞋扬起闪亮的灰尘。每天晚茶时分,总有一些房间由于这种低而甜的狂热乐曲而不停地震颤,同时鲜亮的面庞飘来飘去,好像是被哀怨的喇叭吹落在舞地里的玫瑰花瓣。

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