TRANSCRIPT
Is thisthing on? I'd like to propose a toast.
It's the wild card ofevery event. No matter how perfectly a person has orchestrated it, the toast isthat one live element that threatens to derail everything.
Maybe it's the bridesmaid who treated the toastlike a roast and insulted the groom's weight and appearance. And it doesn'tjust have to be a wedding toast. It could be the retirement party where acolleague gives a 45-minute speech detailing every moment of their friend'scareer while the champagne bubbles go flat. Or of course, there's the classicdrunk speech that could pop up at any event - rambly, incoherent, a littleembarrassing for everyone involved.
There are so many ways a toast can go wrong.And so unless you're a champion public speaker, it can be insanelynerve-wracking when someone asks you to give a toast. On this episode of LIFEKIT, just in time for that New Year's toast, we've got a champion publicspeaker and an absolute squad of experts here to help you reach toastingperfection.
Life willsometimes feel like a fight. The punches...
In 2018, Ramona J.Smith took the stage to give a speech that would ultimately win her the titleof Toastmasters world champion of public speaking.
I married my soulmate. We were married for eight long, beautiful, amazing months.
Obviously, we needthis woman's advice for public speaking. So we called her.
Tell a story. Any time you tell a story, you get the audienceengaged. You get the audience listening. They want to hear what happens. Theywant to be able to connect with you. So that's a great way to start a speech.
Choose a sweet,appropriate anecdote. Try not to choose anything that would embarrass theperson you're toasting, and keep in mind that there might be children or familymembers who don't need to hear about the time you partied all night in Berlinand woke up naked on a park bench, just, you know, hypothetically speaking. Soonce you've got your sweet, inoffensive anecdote, there's a pretty simpleformula for your toast. First, no pressure for a killer opening line here -just introduce yourself and how you know the person you're toasting. Then, tellyour story about the person. Then, connect the anecdote to the eventor occasion that you're giving the toast for. Finally, you canwrap things up with a gentle joke or your wishes for that person.
Dan literally makeshis living by standing up in front of people and making jokes. But when itcomes to toasts, Dan says the point is telling that person how much they meanto you. So when he spoke at his childhood friend's wedding this summer, it wasfrom the heart.
We used to do thisthing where we played one-on-one basketball game. That's how we became friends.And the first game we played, we tied. And then we kept playing, and then wekept tying. And then we realized after a little while that we were tyingintentionally because if we kept tying, it meant we could keep playing, youknow?
By the way, do yousee how Dan picked a nice little anecdote? Anyways, he continued the toast bytalking about how their friendship has evolved over the years.
I'm just very, like,lucky to see the sort of person he's become.
Dan did manage tofind an opportunity for humor and a little gentle teasing.
And then I addedthat I know we were tying intentionally because if I were trying, I would havebeat him easily.
Stand-up comedianAtsuko Okatsuka's philosophy is that if you're nervous, it means you actuallycare, which is a good thing. You're not dead inside. Yay. That said, she has amental trick for stage fright. Tell yourself that your nerves are actuallyexcitement.
So instead of,like, shaking from the nerves or feeling a pit in your stomach from the nerves,it turns into butterflies from excitement.
And while you'redelivering your speech, comedian Dan Perlman recommends finding your audiencewingperson.
If you focus on thepeople in the audience who are paying attention and are giving good energy,then that sort of helps you be comfortable.
Dan Perlman says a good toast is 90 seconds to two minutes long.
I've never beenannoyed that a toast was too short, you know?
Though, we shouldsay, everyone has a different definition of short. Here's Ramona J. Smith.
For a toast, I wouldsay two to three minutes at most.
Wedding enthusiastClare Roth is a bit more generous with her timing.
Two to five minutes -no one is going to get angry about being able to drink their Champagne sooner.
And Ana Silva clocksin as our speediest.
I think if you'regoing over a minute, it better be really worth it. And if you're going overthree minutes, you've probably done too much.
王德恒
好好学习天天向上