Don’t find excuses for hurting other by speech.
Xian'er says so: Hurting others will surely hurt self.
Wang Xiaowu claims that he is an honest man. He dislikes those who beat around the bush, whine about everything, and/or nag.
He thinks that man should be straight forward.
Say what is on the mind without hiding anything.
Xian’er said: What you said make sense.
Wang Xiaowu said: You see, Zhao Xiaocui is going to be an old maid.
For she has a bad temper, and no man dares to marry her.
And Zhang Xiaosi is such a sissy who worries about everything.
What a loser! And Mr. Qian, the moneygrubber.
He does not understand that money is not something you can take with when you die.
He is truly stingy as hell. Have you met anyone who is stingier than him?
Ma Xiufeng always talks about how awful her ex-husband was.
It is as if she is the most miserable and her ex-husband is the worst in the whole world.
What does that make her?
And here is Wu Meili who parades around every day.
She thinks that she is desired by men cross the world.
She really has not clue. I would be worried if I were her.
And Xian’er. I do not know where to start.
And you have all known him over the years…
Xian’er said: Wang Xiaowu, please stop…
Mr. Qian, Zhang Xiaosi, Zhao Xiaocui, Ma Xiufen, and Wu Meili all shouted, gnashing their teeth, Xian’er, let him say as much as he wants...
Wang Xiaowu answered: What now? Isn’t what I said right? …
Something happened later.
Wang Xiaowu could not get out of bed for half a month.
You get the story.
Below are quoted from my Shifu’s new book, Say Good Things—Master Xuecheng’s insight on the path to speaking like a Buddha.
What you think are kind words may not be received the same way.
Saying what’s on your mind can easily hurt others.
Those who are straight forward may be compassionate, but what they say may not be well received.
The mind can be open, but we cannot be too quick to speak our minds.
We need to think before we talk so that we consider how others may feel. Hurting others will surely hurt self.
不要给出口伤人找理由
贤二如是说：伤人必会伤己
王小五说自己是个实在人，最讨厌拐弯抹角的人，
最讨厌唧唧歪歪的人，
最讨厌说话磨磨唧唧的人，
为人处世就应该直来直去。
有话直说，心里怎么想的，就怎么说，不必隐瞒。
贤二说，你讲的好有道理。
王小五说，你看，赵小翠这个人肯定是嫁不出去的，
就她那个坏脾气，哪个男人敢娶她；
张小四那个人胆小怕事，患得患失，一辈子没出息；
钱老板那个财迷，从来都不知道钱是生不带来死不带走，
抠门抠到家了，你们说，还有比他更吝啬的吗；
马秀芬一开口就是她前夫怎么怎么不好，
好像全世界就她最委屈，就她前夫最垃圾，
你们说，有意思吗；
还有吴美丽，整天那么招摇，以为全世界的男人都喜欢她，
都拽成那样了，都不知道愁字咋写。
还有贤二，我实在是懒得说了，这么多年你们都看的真真的.....贤二说，
王小五，快别说了……
钱老板、张小四、赵小翠、马秀芬、吴美丽咬牙切齿地说：贤二，
你别拦着，我们今天就让他说个够……
王小五说，怎么了吗？难道我说的不对吗……
后来，就发生了一些事情，王小五半个月没起床，大家懂的。
以下来自我师父的《好好说话》
自己认为的好话不一定就是好话，心直口快也很容易伤人。
心直口快的人，可能是一个古道热肠的人，
但是说出来的话，却让人不能接受。
心可以直，口不能快，说话要三思而后行，
要考虑别人的感受。伤人必会伤己。
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