Anne of the Island 12 - Graduation and aProposal
It was nearly summer and the weather was much warmer, but nobody at Patty's Place was smiling. It was exam time, and ahead were their final exams for the year and possibly their last exams ever! If they passed, Phil, Stella, Anne, and Priscilla would all be graduates of Redmond College and all holders of Bachelor of Arts degrees.
"I wish I were dead, or that it was tomorrow night," groaned Phil.
"If you live long enough, both wishes will come true," said Anne calmly.
"It's easy for you to be calm," said Phil. "You can do philosophy. I can't! And when I think of that horrible exam tomorrow, I get so nervous."
"You won't fail. How did you do in your Greek exam today?" Anne asked.
"I have no idea! I've studied so much I can't think anymore!" said Phil. The busy days flew by, and when the examinations were over, Anne got first-class honors in English, Priscilla got honors in classics, and Phil got honors in math.
On graduation day Marilla proudly attended the ceremony in Halifax. After Marilla left, Anne went home to Patty's Place to begin packing. "Just imagine, in one week, I'll be in Avonlea! How delightful!" thought Anne, bending over the box in which she was packing her clothes and belongings. "But imagine, in one week, I'll be gone forever from Patty's Place. How horrible!"
Actually, Anne wasn't sure what the future held for her. If Roy proposed to her, everything would change, and he would definitely propose to her soon. Anne felt that she was truly in love with Roy. It was not
exactly
as she had imagined love to be, she admitted to herself, but Roy was a good man, and they would be happy together. "Is anything in life really the way you imagine it to be?" wondered Anne.
That evening, when Roy came to Patty's Place and asked Anne to go for a walk in the park, everyone at Patty's Place knew why. And they thought they knew what Anne's answer would be. "Anne's a lucky girl," said Phil.
"I suppose so," said Stella, shrugging her shoulders. "Roy is a nice fellow, but there doesn't seem to be too much in him."
"Stella! Why do you say that?" demanded Phil.
"I'm not being nasty; it's just that I worry Anne may end up unhappy," Stella explained.
Under an old oak tree in the park—a very romantic spot—Roy asked Anne to marry him. His proposal was perfectly worded, as if he had copied it from a book, but it was also heartfelt and sincere. Anne felt that she ought to be thrilled from head to foot. But she wasn't; she just felt numb.
Anne opened her mouth to say "yes," and then, suddenly, found herself trembling. She felt as if she were looking over a cliff, and then she had a moment of revelation. Quickly, she pulled her hand from Roy's. "Oh, Roy, I can't marry you . . . I can't . . . I can't," Anne cried.
Roy turned pale. "What do you mean?"
"I thought I could marry you, but I can't," said Anne desperately.
"Why can't you?" Roy asked more calmly.
"Because . . ." said Anne, "I don't care enough for you."
Roy's face changed. "So you've just been amusing yourself with my affections this past year?" he asked slowly.
"No, no, I haven't," gasped Anne. Oh, how could she explain? She
couldn't
explain. "Forgive me, Roy," Anne pleaded. "I did think I cared. Really, I did. But I know now that I don't." She looked at the ground.
"You are not the woman I thought you were," said Roy angrily, and then with a bitter tone, "You are the only woman I can ever love. You've ruined my life. Good-bye, Anne." He stormed off.
"Good . . . bye," Anne stammered too quietly for him to hear. She sat in the park, feeling drenched in shame and contempt.
Anne slipped into Patty's Place and ran to her room. "I hope that no one will ever again ask me to get married as long as I live," she sobbed. Phil heard her crying and came in. "Phil," said Anne, "Roy asked me to marry him─and I refused." Her face was red with tears and shame.
"You . . . you refused Roy?" said Phil blankly. "Are you crazy?"
"Oh, Phil, don't scold me," Anne pleaded. "I honestly thought I cared, but at the last minute I realized I couldn't do it."
"Well, Anne, I think you've treated Roy badly. You've been seeing him for a whole year!" said Phil in exasperation.
Anne nodded, embarrassed, and started to cry again. The two stayed up talking until they both felt better.
The next day all the friends at Patty's Place said tearful good-byes. Priscilla and Stella were glad that Anne had not accepted Roy's proposal and told her so. Anne felt slightly better. All the girls hugged each other, made promises to see each other again as soon as possible, and caught the train or ferry to their respective homes.
When Anne returned to Green Gables the next day, everything was as it had always been. At dinner Marilla, Mrs. Lynde, Davy, and Dora caught up on all of Anne's life and filled Anne in on what had happened in Avonlea. They talked about who had gotten married, how the weather had been, and how the spring harvest had turned out.
There was a short silence, and suddenly Davy remarked, "Hey, Anne, did you know Gilbert Blythe is dying?"
"Davy, hold your tongue!" said Mrs. Lynde angrily. "Anne, don't look like that! We didn't mean to tell you so suddenly."
"Is . . . it . . . true?" asked Anne in a voice that was not hers. Her face was so white that Marilla feared Anne was going to faint.
"Gilbert is very ill," said Mrs. Lynde gravely. "He caught typhoid fever just after he arrived. It doesn't look good."
Anne walked blindly across the kitchen, through the hall, and up the stairs to her old room. At its window she knelt down, staring ahead without seeing. The sky was very dark. Rain was beating down on the shivering fields. And Gilbert was dying . . .
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