Susan三叶草 2021年12月17日 上午6:11

2021-12-17 06:25:0402:05 111
所属专辑:Susan三叶草
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In the following chapters, we're going to explore this more.But there is one topic that deserves some particular context.Whenever it is that you're dealing with other human beings, it's not always possible to control how things turn out;nowhere is this more true than with children. Even if you're armed with an abundance of love and good intentions, it's a complicated world: kids have unprecedented access to ideas from everywhere—their friends, the media, the Internet. The most determined parent will still find that it is almost impossible to control all these influences.On top of that,each child is wired differently.We rarely have children who are exactly like us-or like each other—something that often comes as a surprise to new parents.Our children aren't always interested in the same things that we were,and they don't always behave the way we would have.
As such,there is no one-size-fits-all approach that anyone can offer you.The hot water that softens a carrot will harden an egg.As a parent, you will try many things with your child that simply won't work.When this happens,it can be very easy to view it as a failure.Don't.If anything, it's the opposite.If you recount our discussion of emergent and deliberate strategy- the balance between your plans and unanticipated opportunities-then you'll know that getting something wrong doesn't mean you have failed.Instead,you have just learned what does not work.You now know to try something else.
在接下来的章节中,我们将进一步探讨这方面的问题。但要特别说明一点的是,当你和人打交道时,并不总是能控制事情的结果;在这点上,孩子最真实了,即使你有无限的爱和美好的意愿,孩子就是一个复杂的世界:孩子们可以前所未有地接触各式各样的想法——通过他们的朋友、媒体或者互联网。最坚定的父母仍然发现,几乎不可能控制这些影响。除此之外,每个孩子都有不同的性格。他们很少和我们完全一致——或者彼此之间完全一致——这往往会让新晋父母感到惊讶。孩子感兴趣的事情并非完全和我们一样,行为也不同。
因此,没有任何人能提供一个放之四海而皆准的方法。软化胡萝卜的热水会使鸡蛋变硬。作为父母,你会在孩子身上尝试各种方法,但是很多根本行不通。当这种情况发生时,我们很容易将其视为失败。不要这么想,即使得不到预期结果,那也是正常的。你想想我们对紧急和既定策略的讨论——你的计划和意料之外的机会之间的平衡——那么你应该知道做错事并不意味着你失败。相反的,你明白了这方法行不通,应该尝试别的方法了。

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