播音&编辑&后期：小顾
Hello everyone, welcome to English Panorama! This is Rebecca.大家好呀，终于又和大家见面啦。其实这期的选题我纠结了很久，最后还是跟朋友敲定了这个主题，我意在讲述的，爱与死亡。
记得一本医学书上说了这样一件事情，If an old friend is seen and recognized a year later, it is certain that almost every cell in his body is not the one owned by him by the last time he leaves. That is, in terms of organs in his body, he's completely new. 记忆又何尝不是这样呢？而我们的人生，从一开始便置身于一个充满着许多变数的迷宫里，我们从哪里来，到哪里去，都是无从知晓的。因为很多变数都是取决于我们偶然的神思一动，突然间的吉光片羽。放到大一点的圈子来说，某一个人，某一些事，都可以引发许多人的变数。
这个结论放到《红楼梦》里边可能更好阐述一点。Everyone has a unique understanding of the ending of A Dream of Red Mansions；而《红楼梦》之所以残缺，也有着许多的变数。在曹公已死这个变数不曾更改之前，所有打着“真梦”的幌子，不过是借以在自己的小小算盘拨上拨下罢了。And if Cao was alive, he must have changed a lot of it ; Also, if he is lucky enough to finish the manuscript, I am afraid that it is far from the original.
不幸的是，“千古文章未尽才”，尽管有那么多的叹息，《红楼梦》到底还是残缺了；幸好，他不曾在今天活过来。Because death is a real and eternal rest for anyone.
记得以前倒不曾这么想。甚至还想“朝游苍梧，暮游南海”，远远地讨得长生药来，如果是一枚，就和自己的爱人分而食之，同时也颇为忌惮《奔月》中那个有些好奇心的嫦娥，亦想自己一仰脖吞服了自在。But what is the point of a man living far away in the so-called end of the invisible world? 我想，刘阮二人从天台山回来的时候，“竟已历七世”。涌上他们心头的，究竟是一种悲壮的滑稽，还是一种难言的幸运呢？
好在，月亮是冰冷的；天台山虽然缥缈，现在也成了旅游胜地；好在我上面说的一切都是梦话。而地母娘娘那句“为什么生孩子，要生出死亡来”的叹息，也是有着浓浓的黑色的慈爱在里面。She did not know that, to those tired people, her embrace is the salvation.
在汪曾祺的文字里总有着这样的话：“不过，这种东西没有了，也就没有了”；或者是“这城里，很多人都死了。”I think, people who have the familiar experience, will have the same feeling. However, as the city is getting newer and newer, bigger and bigger，“death”and“loss”have become so common that people won’t pay particular attention to it. 搬家之前隔壁住了一位八十老太，她没事的时候就关着门数数念珠，念几声阿弥陀佛，因为她到底深信，那有限的未知是一个铺满莲花的黄金琉璃世界。
曹雪芹倒是不会这么粗浅地认为，他把这个世界看得太明白了。As for what the world after death looks like, although he has some description in the book, in the end it is only his imagination when he was alive.他给我们留下的那一块雪地，却像极了人类最后被放逐了的末世。
就像伊壁鸠鲁的古老戏语抛戏法一样抛出，“最可怕的灾难——死——与我们毫不相干。只要我们在，死就不在；只要死在，我们就不在。”
青埂峰下的顽石或许较为客观地明白这一切。在无限的永生里，可曾有过对自己暗暗地咒诅？好在某些时候它是温润平和的，毕竟它也曾在“繁华花柳地，温柔富贵乡”中摸爬滚打了一番。尽管最后一切还是“渺渺”、“茫茫”、“空空”、“太虚幻”，但让我们从其独特的情感体验中明白了——
Something about love.
Something above love.
昨天晚上看了《The News Room》第2季第5集。代表全美最高职业水准的电视新闻主播Will McAvoy坐在主播台上，倒计时10秒推进的时候，他的黑莓手机显示他的父亲来电。He was particularly aware that his father knew that his promising son was on the news,他没有接这个反常的电话，极其公事公办地播完了一个段落。But during the advertising time he dialed the phone, no one answered. The second advertising time he called back , Will learned that his father had a heart attack, and the situation was critical.中年女监制Mac在玻璃外面看到他打电话，冲进直播室，她催他再次打回去，哪怕没人接，也必须留言给他。She came back from the battlefield, carrying Louis Vuitton's bag into the newsroom, wearing a fine shirt, pencil skirt, classic black high heels.她是金牌监制，是个很tough的女人，她扎起马尾辫，用英国腔骂人“stupid”，email乱发……真的是挺萌的。她跟Will说，打给他，这对他很重要，就算在直播中也要打给他，就算是留言也要让他知道。
From season 1 to season 2 , Will is always a middle-aged man with a lot of worries, he is not happy at all.他几百万美金年薪、老板要看他脸色、从来都不笑、除了播报新闻基本上不说话。他爱的女人Mac曾经抛弃他，他下了班躺在酒店的天台上喝酒、不需要人陪、没有人能说服。他放任自流、肆意妄为，他在公共场合乱说话、被送进医院，脸上永远没有笑容，冰冷地好像一座雪山。Mac说，你从来没有想过与我结婚吧？他不说话，从办公室抽屉掏出Tiffany的黑丝绒盒子，里面起码有2克拉。And he explained nothing.
Will告诉Mac，父亲去世了，10分钟前。上一次广告时间他打电话回去，他妹妹通知了父亲的死讯。她说，Will！他说，It’s fine. Mac这个不依不饶的女人，退出了直播室。
The countdown was 10 seconds, and the camera pushed again, Mac stared at the monitor, but Will kept his head down. Mac reminded him through headphones that the TV lens was already his close-up. He did not look up and remained silent for 20 seconds. Will McAvoy，全美职业程度最高的新闻主播，在电视镜头前长达20秒的空白，他缓缓抬起头来，说了一句well,I guess it's just us now.他的父亲经常酒后伤人，不过Will解释，自从他有还击能力之后，父亲再也无法伤害他了。
他用长达20秒的沉默，表达情绪。这个世界，没有父亲了。这个剧集里，这个镜头以后，我最喜欢的人，从Mac变成了失去了父亲的Will。
直视镜头，再次停顿了5秒之后，Will回到主播的语速，他说，we have an important correction in the Trayvon Martin story.
而对于我而言，可能是林妹妹的死，才让人觉得爱是那么可贵。
如果再扯上“风月宝鉴”的话题来说，“爱”和“死”正像极了这镜子的两面。就像贾瑞明明知道道士“不可照正面”的嘱咐，But he still can't resist the temptation ,“以假为真”，把自己一股脑给搭进去了。而《红楼梦》里的人绝大部分都不懂这镜子的妙用，这可以理解，就像阿Q口中的“吴妈，我要同你困觉”，到底还算是人生中那一丁点可怜巴巴的乐趣。Anyway, if we take everything serious, we’d like to think of something unrealistic in the midnight.也只有在那时候，想想农人的两三杯黄汤在手，“老婆孩子热炕头”。这三件事一妥当，那种陶然的快乐，确实羡煞旁人。
如果林妹妹也和宝二爷高高兴兴地结婚，不可避免地又要回到那条老路上了。宝二爷是天底下第二个最不善生计的人，林妹妹就不得不撇下作诗的工夫，在油盐酱醋上把脸熬得瘦瘦黄黄的。What's more, there will always be unpleasant things for a married couple while getting along with each other, she will cry, or threaten him with scissors on her hands. While he will quarrel for a moment to die, and then to become a monk.如果是这样侥幸地折腾到土地公公土地婆婆那份上，林妹妹在宝二爷的眼里，还是一颗“无价之宝珠”吗？
好在作书人不会那样去写。他让林妹妹活在诗中，死在诗中。像极了《香港制造》里中秋说的那句话：
“我们死得那么年轻，所以我们永远年轻。”
末了还是雪地，一切都还在继续。But I still yearn for a heavy snow with my hands, for the whole world to be hidden in the snow with laughter and tears.我仍渴望广袤的雪地里深深浅浅地叠映着我比雪地还要苍白的影子；我仍渴望一切将被掩埋，所有的光明还形形色色地照耀着大地。
节目到这里就结束啦，我是福说的Rebecca，感谢各位的收听，See you the next time！Bye~
jeby
超棒~！